A story that my son, daughter and one of their friends wrote

NOTE: I TAKE NO RESPONSIBILITY FOR THIS STORY --BILLY

The Fellowship of the String By: Bob Coin
Somewhere deep in Off-Center Earth, there lived a Bopit. This Bopit lived in a very nice lilac bush that smelled like roses. The Bopits name was Oblib. He was shortly going to celebrate his 9th 11th birthday, and the whole of Bopiton was invited, for this was to be the wildest party ever! His friend Handoff the Purple Gizard was coming, for there was to be a football game, and Gizards specialize in football refereeing. (By the way, Gizards are sort of like Wizards, only they play football and eat chicken feet.) James Blonde (who happens to be ‘Secret Agent Elf”) was also coming. The day of the party arrived. Handoff had arrived, but Secret Agent Elf James Blonde was no where to be seen. Oblib had a coupon for 18 free meals at the Blue Heilamonster.18 is for some reason lucky to Bopits. Whoever won the football game got the coupon. There’s a rule in Bopit football that you must run with the ball-’cause otherwise you’ll just be standing there.
There were 18 kinds of food, drinks, and desserts.18 is considered lucky, because if you are allowed to try to bungee jump when 18 you are very lucky, for it is dangerous, yet it is their national pastime.
Odorf was going to be playing, too. (Odorf was Oblib’s uncles-cousins-brothers-roommates-nephew twice removed.) After the game the Elves from Split-Down-The-Middle Dale (which is fairly close to the northern end of the globe) were celebrating their victory (because they won) and the quarter-back, the great Elf Toymaker, was making a speech. After he was done it was Oblib’s turn. His speech dragged on for a very long time. Then suddenly he said abruptly,” I need to tie my shoe.” and he bent down and took a string out of his pocket, then tied his shoe with it. (This string did not look like an ordinary string. It was purple, and weighed more than an ordinary purple string, so that it made you walk crooked when you had it on.) When Oblib had tied his shoe with it he turned an odd shade of blue, The stage also turned blue, so that you couldn’t see him. And just when they needed him most, Secret Agent Elf James Blonde appeared! He leaped onto the stage, grabbed Oblib, yanked the shoe off his foot, and quickly untied it. No one saw this, however, because Oblib’s speech was so long and boring that everyone that every one fell asleep. After this James Blonde left. Oblib ran after him yelling,” Give me my string back!” This woke the Bopits up, and they chased after them. James put the string in a cup of water, and then put the cup in the freezer. ”Where’s my string?” Oblib yelled as he ran into the room. ”I’ll tell you tomorrow. ”James replied. So the next day James called Handoff, and his assistant, Shortlock Holmes the dwarf. Then he took the cup out of the freezer and in it was the string, except it had writing on it. ”Writing!” Shortlock exclaimed. ”It is the One String of power, ”said Handoff, ”how did you obtain this string, Oblib?” ”I was bungee jumping one day and I saw something on the ground. I picked it up, and back up top I met a skinny, ugly, blue thing that said in a weird voice, ’Lolipop, lolipop, where’s my string?’ then it saw the string and chased me back here. I’ve had it ever since, almost losing it to the Bagville-Sackensis. ”replied Oblib. ”It must be destroyed!” exclaimed James. ”But how?” asked Oblib, ”I am to old to do it, for I am sure it can only be destroyed in a certain place.” ”It must be destroyed by the scissors that are guarded in the dark tower” James said. ”I’ll go,” volunteered Odorf. ”ME too” said James, Shortlock, Handoff, and a man named Koinkeedink. What A. Koinkeedink.
The next morning they were off. After much debate they decided to first travel to Split-Down-The-Middle Dale to receive the council of the great Elf Toymaker. So they began their long hike trough the woods. Before long, Handoff, who was leading, whispered, ”Everyone down!” They all hit the deck.(It rather hurt the deck, but they were to busy to notice) ”What is it?” Odorf asked. ”The String Ghosts” replied Handoff, ”They are the servants of the Dark Lord. Neither living, nor dead. They are looking for the string.” Odorf felt the String in his pocket grow heavy (heavier than it was, anyway).He had a sudden urge to take it out, and tie his shoe with it. Just as he was pulling it out, however, Koinkeedink saw him and quickly pulled his hands away.
The String Ghosts departed. The company got up, and ran pell-mell down the hill. Just as they reached a ring of trees at the bottom, the String Ghosts appeared. Odorf grabbed the string, and quickly tied it. Instantly he was in a world of blue. The String Ghosts pulled out their paint guns and fired green balls of paint at him. Odorf dodged a few balls of paint, but eventually got hit by one, and got sticky green paint all over his face. Some of the paint can be removed by boiling the root of the Pillow-jean tree. However most of it must be removed by saying the magic words (which are only known to a few Elves and Snoron).If the paint is not removed within 3 days,70 minates, and 67 seconds, you will melt into a green ball of paint to be used by the String Ghosts who ride on flying penguins, that constantly screech “Moo”.
When Odorf realized he had been hit he yelled “I can’t see! Well actually I can, but all I can see is green!” They boiled the root and got the paint out of his nose, but not off anywhere else. Koinkeedink carried Odorf with all speed to Split-Down-The-Middle Dale. When they got there they went in through the crack that went down the middle of a HUGE glacier. The Elves welcomed them and gave them warm blankets to keep them warm. The food was good even though it took forever to thaw out, even though the Elves have REALLY powerful microwaves to thaw their food out. Then they called the great Elf Toymaker to remove the paint from Odorf’s face. After saying the magic words (which happen to be ‘Grape Sausage and a Long Pointy Nose’) Odorf was cured. It had taken them 3 days and 67 seconds to get there ,so another 70 minutes, and Odorf would have been a paintball.
After he had slept a long time a yellow smiley face with arms and legs came into his room, and introduced himself as ‘Smiley Man’. Smiley Man was 2ft.2 7/10 in. and ate nothing but tomatoes. He offered to join their fellowship, and was readily accepted. The great Elf Toymaker decided to also send Ranastick, a man from Herewall, the son of the steward. Handoff had a few words to say to Odorf. These words were,” Stop being a jerk, and leave the string in your pocket!” The next day they set off. They where going to go through a mole hole, but it was inhabited by unfriendly moths, so they couldn’t. So in the end they had to head to the underground mines of Smoria. However, they couldn’t get the door open, so Handoff tried magic words. (Such as Ooga Boo) After many attempts he finally began pounding on it yelling,” Open you stupid door!” and the door swung open.” What kinda magic words are those?” Smiley Man asked. ”Who cares, as long as they work!” replied Ranastick. When they entered the mine after walking through several passageways they saw a room that appeared to be a kitchen and entered. When Shortlock saw the room he yelled, ”NO, no, it can not be!” and ran over to a table. The rest of the fellowship ran over to him and asked “What is the matter?” When he finally answered he said “I left some food here and now it’s gone!” Meanwhile Ranastick had become bored (and hungry) so he started looking through a nearby refrigerator, and found some moldy tomato cheesecake. He was about to eat it when he leaned against the fridge and knocked it over with a very loud noise. This noise woke up all the Forks that were sleeping in the mine. (Forks are 4 headed creatures that stab you with their pointy heads. Forks were at one time Elves only they were evil so they got locked in their giant microwaves which made them grow 3 extra pointy heads.) The Forks started chasing them and using crossbows to shoot spoons at them. The Fellowship was fighting back at the Forks when suddenly they all ran away. Right then a giant salamander appeared behind them and started chasing them. Handoff tripped on his long purple robe. Right before the salamander swallowed him whole he yelled, ”I knew I should have worn a t-shirt today!” They ran with all speed (again) to the exit. When they got out, they sat around crying for 48 minutes and 8 seconds. Then they ran with all speed (again, again) to a forest up ahead. It was Slothborien, The Land of the Boring Sloths. To get through they had to get through without getting bored to death. “Blah blah blah blah” Ranastick was SOOO bored that they had to teach him to play checkers. By the time they finished teaching him to play checkers they had arrived at the secret place of the Elves, where they met the Elf Queen, Sadfraud. She gave them council, along with some very pretty sunglasses, and super sunscreen (one small drop is enough to keep the sunburn away for up to 5 days!) Since they would have to travel on the infamous Chocolate Syrup River, she also provided special boats for them to use.
The next day they set off down the river. Koinkeedink, Smiley Man, and Odorf were in one boat. Shortlock, Ranastick, and James were in the other. They traveled for a few days and then stopped at a rest stop in the middle of no where. Odorf wandered off on his own, and Ranastick followed. When they were quite a ways away, Ranastick began to talk to Odorf. “I was just wondering,” he began, “If you would mind lending me that string.” “WHAT?!” Odorf yelled, “You know I can’t do that.” “Well, why not?” asked Ranastick “Because we are going to DESTROY it, NOT lend it to anyone who asks, that’s why!” Odorf exclaimed. “What will you do if I don’t ask?” Ranastick yelled. “Huh? What is that supposed to mean?” Odorf asked, confused. “It means I will just take it from you! that’s what!” Ranastick laughed. Odorf began running as fast as he could, not knowing where he was going, just trying to get away from Ranastick. Ranastick leaped, and tackled Odorf. Ranastick tried to take the String from him, but Odorf quickly tied his shoe with it, and ran off. Then the Forks that had been following the Fellowship, attacked. Back at camp, Smiley Man began searching for Odorf. The rest of the Fellowship scattered when the Forks attacked, and began fighting in various places. Odorf ran back into camp, jumped in a boat, and began paddling off. In the nick of time, Smiley Man came back and jumped in the boat along side Odorf. “What are you doing here?” Odorf asked. “Why, coming with you, of course.” Smiley Man replied. “You can’t…”he started to say, but seeing that Smiley Man wasn’t going to change his mind he stopped. “Oh, all right, you can come.” “Thanks very much,” Smiley Man replied, smiling. So they paddled off. James, Shortlock, and Koinkeedink were fighting when they heard Ranastick screaming for help. They ran in that direction, just to see Ranastick
laying on the ground.

While all this had been going on at the camp, Forks were attacking Ranastink. No one noticed, but a boy named Joe whipped out a sword and helped Ranastick fight them off. They captured him, however, and the last thing he saw was their captain stabbing Ranastick with a steak knife. Then he passed out.

Just after the forks ran off was when James, Koinkeedink, and Shortlock ran up. Ranastick told them what had happened. He told them to go after, and rescue Joe.Those were the last words he ever spoke.

So while Odorf and Smiley Man went on with the quest by themselves, James, Shortlock, and Koinkeedink went after the Forks. THE END